Failure and Forgiveness

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

EPHESIANS 4:3 

Failures at home come in all sorts of sizes, shapes and weights.

There are the small failures called mistakes, errors or goofs: breaking a piece of china; spilling catsup on a new shirt; ripping your jeans; while wearing golf shoes, stepping on your wife’s foot; failing to carry out the garbage.

There are the heavier, medium-sized packages of failure that hurt a little deeper: shouting at the kids for the fourth time in one day, saying something hurtful to your spouse, habitually promising something to your kids and then going back on your promise.

Then there are the cumbersome and heaviest of failures that leave us feeling crushed under the weight: a divorce, unfaithfulness, an estranged relationship, a rebellious teenager who thinks he is always right, physical or verbal abuse, the failure to lead your wife and children spiritually.

How can families deal with big and little failures?

First, I think we’ve got to be truthful about our sins. The Bible calls this confession. When we confess a sin, it means we agree with God concerning that sin and turn from it.

I need to confess my failure to God and to those I’ve offended and then change my mind about the sin. I just can’t keep on sinning, taking my sin’s impact lightly.

Second, the Scriptures teach that we’ve got to forgive. Forgiveness is not optional equipment in the Christian life. We are commanded to forgive because we’ve been forgiven.

To forgive others means we give up the right to punish them. We no longer hold the offenses against them.

Forgiveness is at the heart of Christianity. Your marriage—and mine—must be the union of two people who are not willing to allow anything to come between them.

Discuss: Are you usually quick to ask forgiveness— and to extend it? Why is it often hard to be quick to forgive those who fail us? Are you still punishing your spouse for something hurtful he or she said or did?

Pray: Thank God for His willingness to forgive you, and pray for a heart willing to forgive those who fail you.

FORGIVENESS IS NOT OPTIONAL EQUIPMENT IN THE CHRISTIAN LIFE.